The Postman Always Poops Once and other ramblings

I recently started my new position as a property manager for a luxury condominium community. My office is located inside a beautiful clubhouse where the fireplace is always warm and cozy and happy music is playing in the background. You will usually find me in my office enjoying a nice cup of coffee with my favorite creamer as I go about my daily tasks of running the joint.

Before this job I was in outside sales. The money was great, it was always exciting and challenging. After awhile, though the stress made my eye twitch, my heart race and I transformed into an awful wife and mom. Plus in the winter my feet were always cold. Always. So I left the world of B2B sales and came to this less stressful environment.

This job is a piece of cake and in this economy I am very grateful to be making decent money, receiving generous benefits and not having a boss in the near vicinity. But I'm bored. You can usually catch me watching Oprah out my office door in the afternoon wishing someone would come in needing my expertise. About anything. Heck, I'd help them fill out grocery list if they asked.

The monotony of my day is broken up by my friendly mailman. The first time I met him he introduced himself, gave me my mail and took off around the corner in the opposite direction of the door. I figured he was thirsty. The man seemed to be thirsty every single day.

I happened to follow him out of my office one afternoon and realized he was not walking to the kitchen to get a sip of water or a cup of coffee. Oh no. He was stopping in the men's room. And staying there a really long time. Apparently my mailman's biological clock is set to occur every day at my stop. He is doing his business in my office with no embarrassment or apologies. Every day.

And, can I just point out how very different women are in this regard? When I worked for a company that had a unisex restroom (Stupidest. Idea. Ever.) my friend TK and I would go to the Shell station to take care of our business. It was done privately and discreetly. I cringe now every day when I see the mail truck pull up. I just know way too much about the poor guy now.

Speaking of which, this reminds me of the very funny chapter book Logan and I are reading this week. It's part of a series and if you have a typical boy with "boy" humor, he will love to read Captain Underpants And The Perilous Plot Of Professor Poopypants (Captain Underpants) We've been reading this all week and it has just been a hoot. I'm sensing a pattern here.

(When I picked Logan up from school this week, he announced that he likes to pee in the snow in our backyard (When, son? And why?) Curious, I asked him why. He said simply, "No flush. No wash". It seems that part of the bathroom visit has been cramping his style.)

The time has come for me to address a very serious topic. I would like to share with you an important lesson I learned this week. (Please pay attention so that you never have to go through the pain and frustration that I experienced.)

It's about shoes, my friends. And missing out on really really good sales. I am not a fan of shopping just for the sake of shopping. That's just not my nature. But I love a cute shoe and I live for a good deal.

I went to the mall with my friend Kali and was devastated to learn that I was a day late and a dollar short. There was a sale that I did not know about.

If you are like me and not a regular shopper, you are not informed about upcoming sales and special stock that is scheduled to arrive in your favorite shops. You do not have the opportunity to make friends with the sales person who will be earning a nice commission check off your purchases.

Really bad things can happen when you are not privy to this information.

Like this. Would you just look at these adorable shoes I missed out on! They are only $25.00. Twenty. Five. Dollars. And they are soft and supple and cute and cheap.

If I wore a size 10, I would be in cute-shoe heaven. But, I do not, so I am not.

Kali and I also found some Uggs marked down from $250.00 to $60.00. Again, if I had big ol' giant Sasquatch feet I would have been a shoe-in (I am so sorry. I just had to use that pun). Unfortunately, I have delicate and adorable size 7 feet. As do all the skinny, heavy-diamond wearing, Mercedes-driving, nanny-hiring, house cleaner-employing, spa-treatment-getting, lettuce-eating women who have the time to flit about the mall and snatch these bad boys up before I get there.

It wasn't all bad though. Just take a peek at what I found for my bedroom? It's at TJ Maxx and it's on clearance for only $15.00. My husband (unlike a lot of husbands) actually enjoys being a part of the process of selecting paint colors, flooring, furniture and paintings. We usually agree on our choices and have fun doing this together. I took a picture of this to make sure he liked it too. He's a bit iffy. What do you think? I think it's fab.

On a final note I have some celebrity news. It's been a somber week with Heath Ledger dying, messed-up Brittney losing custody of her two sons, Lindsay having to work in a morgue as part of her parole requirements.

Let's talk about something happy now.

Have you ever watched that TLC show about the Duggar family? They have 17 biological children (whose names all start with the letter J). Michelle Duggar is a very happy, laid back mom who runs a tight ship, home schools her children and has a debt-free household. Well, she finally got rid of her really big hair. This is cause for celebration. All of the moms around the world are rejoicing for this one sister who has been saved from outdated hair. Amen, and have a great day.

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