Saturday Exploring

This is the view from where Boogs goes to school, its about 2 miles from our home. Nice view seems slightly wasted on a daycare-but hey, here there are nice views everywhere.
After taking the above shot, we headed downtown to the Farmers Market and spent our only cash on a bag of tiny little apples that were perfect for kids. Then we headed across the street to the marina. Here is Boogs looking for fish. We saw a GIANT one swimming by, that in my opinion, looked a little mean. I wouldn't want to swim with that guy.
Then we walked down to one of our favorite little beaches. Kiki and Boogs thought it was funny to kick the water and nearly fall in. When Jim stopped them, Boogs threw himself in the sand in protest.
Afterwards we attempted to take some pictures. They didn't cooperate with the smiling and looking at the camera, but finally with the promise of skittles, I got them to both at least look at me.
Then, after nap we went exploring at the Historic Barns by the old State Hospital. Jim found a track and they were intently trying to discover what sort of animal left it. Kindred decided it was a fox, then walked over to a hole next to the fire hydrant and declared that one as belonging to an elephant. That made us laugh.

This is the first time in three weeks that Jim has actually been home on the weekend. So we try to make the best of it by enjoying the beautiful fall day.


The above picture is a little pool near a creek that we stopped at. This is just before Boogs walked right into the creek, falling into the water up to his thighs. He cried and asked for a towel, which we didn't have. We had been walking for about 15 minutes at that point, so I took out Kiki's fleece coat and turned them into makeshift pants, then we trekked back to the car.
After getting new pants, socks, and shoes we went to the park by our home and had some last minute fun. On the way home we detoured, rented Incredibles and Iron Man and I made dinner for the boys. Jim and I were looking forward to a juicy hamburger, but as I began cooking I discovered we had no burger. So I quick made the boys food, went to the store and gathered stuff for Sundaes. When I got back they had Chocolate Peanut butter Rice Dream with caramel sauce, with Reeses Cereal, Gummy Bears, and Reeses Pieces. Yum!

Iron Man was excellent, the burger that we ate, with rice cheese, was excellent, my Coke Zero was Excellent and spending time with Jim for once was the most excellent.

Hope everyone's weekend was just as fun!

It's Sistah HB in Da House!

I just got an email from my mom. She sent me a picture of her from 1966. She's standing in front of the house she grew up in, and ya'll? She looks fabulous? Is that blouse not delightful. Tom's BFF Tim Gunn would definitely approve.

At the time this picture was taken, my mother already had five young children. And I wasn't one of them. Which explains the not-yet-content look on her face. Can you see it? Because it is most certainly there.

My mom knew there was something bigger and better to come into her life and it would happen the very next year when I was born. Apparently I didn't complete her either, though. Which accounts for Sisters Seven and Sassy.

I just take pleasure in knowing that I am in her favorite. Oh, who am I kidding? Despite her denials, we all know she has always loved her boys best. They didn't cause her as much worry as us girls. Goody-Two-Shoe Jerks.


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Where I Was Today...and Saturday

The Mouth of Platte, originally uploaded by Sister Sassy 919.

This was taken after taking a canoe trip down the lower Platte you end just before it dumps into Lake Michigan. I waded out into the river to take these shots, it was up to my chest but it is so beautiful!

In case you can't tell, I'm standing in the river, near the end, looking across a little sandy stretch between me and Lake Michigan. On the right side you can see part of the Sleeping Bear Dunes.

It was JimmyEW, niece Jiller and her boyfriend Frakenstein. She had such a great time on Saturday that she and Frank drove back up late last night to enjoy it one more time.

The weather was cool and the air chilly, but when I waded out into the river to shoot this the water felt warm and inviting. The temperature was actually warmer than the air.

I do have to say, Canoing with JimmyEW was a bit different than with Sister Redd. Although he was good at steering and all... he was no Sister Redd. She and I rocked it, he and I ran into land masses and other boaters. But I have to say, most of the collisions with boats was purposeful on Jimmy's part. He was trying to take out Jiller and Frankenstein.

At one point Frank stood in the canoe and began serenading Italian style. It was magnific!

So... I didn't run at all this week, but I canoed twice. That counts for something, doesn't it?

Have a happy 4th, I'm out of here!

Enjoy the shot!

Oh The Pressure of a Title

I interrupt this bloggy break to talk you about a few important issues. And I know that Sisters Blog hasn't been on a break, but I have. Please tell me you've noticed that I haven't been around much. Because even though it's summer and I'm doing very important things like watching Flipping Out on Bravo and drinking beer on the deck with my husband, I have really been missing you all.

And I'll be back soon. That is my plan. But first I need to figure out how I can blog while riding a tube behind our boat, taking Logan to swim lessons and trying to keep up with the weeds in my garden. And the rabbits, who seem to enjoy tormenting me year after year. They are so lucky I don't set a trap and lay in wait for them.

Anyway. Tonight begins the Sisters Annual "Let's Get Together and Talk" weekend. And it's not just for our sisters, but for all the girls over the age of 18 who are related to us. Which probably doesn't mean you, so give up the dream.

This year, I am the hostess. Which terrifies me because Sisters Big and Mary Elephant hosted the first two years and the bar was raised mighty high. I finally decided to not even attempt to achieve their level of food deliciousness. And that is a very good thing for whomever hosts next year, because ya'll? I'm lowering the standard this weekend. And for that, I am mighty sorry.

I needed to communicate some vital information to the Sister Family so that they would be adequately prepared for the weekend. Sassy enjoyed the back-and-forth emails so much that she asked to post them. And since I usually do whatever she tells me to, here they are for your entertainment.

And lurkers? We see you here every day. Don't be afraid to comment and tell us what you're doing this weekend. Sassy and I are pretty nice. Well, I'm pretty nice. With Sassy, it just depends on the day. Oh, I kid. She's almost always nice. Ya'll have a good week end and I'll be back soon.

Sister HB:
Here's the deal:
You arrive Friday. Be prepared to eat, drink and be merry. We'll listen to our CD, talk, drink some drinks, talk some more. Swing in our new swing. Mom will weed my gardens. We'll have a fire in the fire pit. Feel free to roast a marshmallow. Remember that I am not the cook that Dianna and Robin are, but I have the best of intentions.

We'll draw names to see who sleeps where. Although Tom already called "Top Bunk" for Rachel because he figures she weighs about "a buck ten". Apparently the rest of us are lard asses. And he means that with all the love in the world.

If you have a request to sleep alone, let me know. I can make that work. If you want to sleep on the boat and pretend you're all exotic, I can do that too. Whatev.

I have five pillows. You do the math. If you like a special cozy blanket please bring that. If you need me to spoon you to sleep I'm open to that as well. I'm the hostess with the mostess.
Please remember that the master bedroom and master bath have not been remodeled. Or decorated. They are ugly. Be kind.

Saturday morning, I will prepare a delicious breakfast. Shower, shave shit. (Sorry, I just had to say that.) We need to leave my house by 10am. Did you know we're going on a canoe trip? Try not to be hung over, mmm'k?

We'll arrive at the Platte River. They'll show us how to canoe and not tip. Some of you will tip though. It's gonna happen. Deal with it. Then a guy will follow me down to our destination where I will drop off the tahoe and food. Please don't let me leave without distributing beverages for our 3 Hour Tour. Really it's 2 1/2 hours. Should we have a cooler in the canoe as well? Talk to me about this one, people. Do we want just water, diet Coke, and juice boxes for Rachel? Or also some adult beverages for the canoing portion of the day?

At the end of the river, we will arrive at sugar sand beaches of beautiful Lake Michigan. Don't forget your swimsuit. There will also be some yummy food for lunch. And by "yummy" I mean "edible".

We'll relax, watch Sassy swim, talk some more. Go back to my place and get ready to go out.
That night, we do the Progressive Dinner-Traverse City Restaurant Style. We'll start at Cafe Habana. We'll end at Poppycocks. We may go somewhere to listen to some music and watch Jill dance. Because she's cute.

Sunday. Get up. Please leave. Kidding. Relax, drink coffee, eat some bagels and fruit because I aint cooking. Then get out of my house already.

Any questions? Any suggestions? Can't wait to see you.

Sister Big:
Oh all right. I'll come; I've got nothing better to do. You can spoon me, feed me, heck, you can even spoon-feed me!

We have to pick up "Buck Ten" from GR airport at 11:00, stop by the Barothy Lodge for a look at a place for a family reunion, swing by Crystal to look at a barn, then we'll be in Traverse City. ETA: 5:30 p.m.

See ya Friday.

Rachie Roo:
"Buck twenty-eight" here.

Mom, why are we going to a barn? Sister HB, I don't really like juice boxes, although I do appreciate the offer. Can't wait to see everyone!

Sister Sassy
WHo do I get to snuggle? Can I just go home and climb in bed with Jim, then go back? Because I'm afraid of rachel falling through the top bunk on top of me.

And HB forgot to mention the pageant that Kiiki, Logan and Boogs are putting on. That is right before Dinner on Friday.

HB: Does anyone have advice about canoe beverages?

Sassy: YOu can get one of those floating coolers-I'll suggest lots of water in the hot sun

Rachie Roo: agree with the water suggestion.

HB: Where does one find a fancy cooler like that?

Sister Sassy
uh... I'd try a store. Duh! But seriously dude, the water in the river should be cold, we can throw them in a mesh bag and hang them in the water to trail alongside our canoe. LIke a fish net but not for fish... Like a beer net, or coke net.

HB: You got a net?

Sister Sassy
You got an itch to bug me? lol, jk. I have a red mesh laundry bag belonging to Kiki. That could work if I find it. I'm sure Logan has something similar.

Sister Big
The net idea is an awesome one. That way we don't have to worry about tipping and losing a cooler. A couple of nets is even a better idea. Three hours in a canoe on the water can make one thirsty.

Sister Sassy
I have my big red net laundry bag for drinks for my canoe. We have a cooler- its skinny though so it doesn't fit a ton.

Sister Redd
I WANT ADULT BEVERAGES!! I DON"T CARE IF THEY ARE N A NET OR NOT AND WHERE DO I xxxxxxx

Sister Sassy
If I'm sharing a bed, does that mean I have to shave my legs?

Sister HB
Sassy- You're sleeping with me and your legs better be silky smooth. I don't want to be scraped when you roll over in you sleep.

All: Does anyone have a small cooler? I have one, but I think we should use two for the beverages. They'll float, so if we tip save the drinks, then your partner. In that order.
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Fathers Day Tribute

I once had a massage at a place in town, it was so freaking good that, as Sister Mary Elephant said, "I felt like I got properly laid." Quite funny, but true. I left that session feeling like I could fly, feeling great emotionally and energized physically.

When I heard that this awesome place was having an essay contest for Father's Day to win a deserving Dad a 1 hour massage, I knew I had to enter. If I felt as good as I did after only 1/2 hour, I can't imagine what an hour would do for someone. Especially my tired and over worked husband. So I wrote and rewrote and finally submitted my piece a few hours before the deadline. And this is what I wrote.

My husband is in dire need of relaxation. He works incredibly hard to provide for our family at the expense of his health, body and time with his family. This time away from us especially weighs on him. Every day that he is away from us he feels like he is trading precious time, for money. I tell him his money is providing our livelihood and paying our bills but the guilt still weighs on him.

He works very hard, often working 14 ½ hour days at least twice a week. Every other weekend we hardly see him at all. He works from 8am Saturday morning till 10:30 pm then turns around the next day and goes in to open the place at 5am. This schedule drains him, beating him down and making him very tired by the time it comes to Sunday night. Then he has to get up and work from 8am till 10:30 on Monday. I truly don't know how he does it.

We try to compensate for this lack of time by shoving everything we can into the weekends he is home, but I fear that just drains him all the more. He truly has no down time, no time to himself. Every moment that he has free is spent with me and our children, he takes nothing for himself. He spends no time or money on himself. If you want to read what his typical weekend is like, click this link to read exactly what he does every day.

My husband is amazing. He's an amazing man, husband, friend and most importantly, father. He himself grew up without a father, or rather, four awful fathers that didn't stick around very long. Not having a father around him made him all the more determined to be the father he wished he always had. The father he never had a chance to have. I find his patience, love and the guidance of our children amazing. A man who grew up in chaos is a loving rock of stability for our family; he is this without having had anyone to learn from. He parents from his heart and his heart is filled with goodness.

We have been married for nearly 11 years, been parents for 4 and he is truly the love of my life, my partner and my best friend. A massage would not only be a great gift for him, but it would help him therapeutically. It would give him the time and relaxation his body and spirit need to continue being a great husband, father and employee. Please consider JimmyEW.

...and guess what? I won! Or rather, he did!

Happy Father's Day to all you dads out there (especially you Wade, our one constant male reader! ;) ). Hope you have a great one!
Below is a video I made for him for Father's Day two years ago, just after Sawyer was born. I LOVE it.

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8 Week Challenge: THE FINALE

After I had my son I suffered from postpartum depression. It was a really awful time in my life. Really really bad.

To help cope, I began taking a low-dose anti-depressant. It helped immensely. I no longer struggled every day to get out of bed. I stopped wanting to sleep through my life. The thought of putting Logan in a carseat was no longer frightening to me. And I quit being mean to my husband.

Almost a year ago I stopped taking the medication. I was fearful at first. What if the old feelings returned? What if I found that I couldn't handle life? So many "what ifs" crowded my brain but I powered through and stopped.

I began experiencing feelings that had been "masked" if you will. I cry at movies again. When I find something touching, I tear up. I like that. I really do.

But, last week I decided to go back on them. For many reasons. One is because I am peri-menopausal. And I could handle this, I think however something bigger is happening in the Sister family.

Our dad is dying. I'm not ready for it. I'm not handling it well. I don't know who I am supposed to be without my father. And that really scares me.

I find myself breaking down with absolutely no warning. I will walk into the kitchen for a drink and just fall down to the floor in painful sobs. And while I understand that grieving is completely natural, when you add hormones into the mix, it makes it that much more difficult.

So let me apologize for a moment that our last week of Getting Fit From the Inside Out is a bit of a downer. I don't intend for it to be. But this is all a part of it. For me, anyway.

I have been working on my eating issues and feel pretty darned good about them. I have been moving my body more. I actually walk, or play tennis or ride my bike several times a week. I have been choosing healthier foods and going to bed earlier. I even got a better job which has been an amazing blessing to my life.

And yet, I found that these two glaring, sad, inevitable things were causing me to not be such a good mom. To not be a happy and loving wife. To not be a kind and fun sister (sorry Sassy). And to not be a good friend.

I am taking action. Just to help me get through this process. To help me not lose it when I am so sad. To let me be the person I need to be even though I fear others may judge my choice. But I have to do what is right for me. And you have to do what is right for you.

It has been a wonderful, enlightening and amazingly empowering 8 Week Challenge. Sassy is rocking the Weight Watchers house and running her diminishing butt off. And you all have held our feet to the fire. We appreciate that and are so very grateful.

Let's keep up the good work. Let's love our bodies as they are. Let's work to improve our health habits and lifestyle. Let's keep getting fit on the inside. Then we'll feel great about the outside. Amen?

For more cheerful frump fighting tips, head over to Fussy's.
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Untitled.

The Sister Honey Bunch family babysat for Sassy tonight so she could go on a hot date with her husband.

So, while she was enjoying yummy appetizers, a salad, an entree and dessert, I was changing her youngest kid's poopy diaper. I'm just sayin'.

We did our best to wear the boys out. They played basketball, badmitton, rode bikes, did some driveway art, kicked around a soccer ball, built a fort and colored pictures.

Then they decided they were starving and had some trail mix and Popsicles.

And when I say "trail mix" I mean Teddy Grahams, Cheese Its, Pretzels and Raisins. All in the same bowl. I'm not crazy, you know.

Then they collapsed in front of the TV to watch a movie.

Here are Sassy's brats with their Uncle Tom watching Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

Here's my brat. He walked out of the shower to discover his cousins snuggled up with his daddy. Sometimes that don't sit so well with an only child. That only child might have to barge his way in on the action.

Sometimes Sassy's oldest gets a little annoyed when that happens and he gets squished in the corner of the chair. Good times. Good times.
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Moving on Faith

I lived in Chicago for 1 year, during that year I was a stay home mom. This is a brief long drawn out story about how instead of putting my head in an oven, JimmyEW and I moved on faith alone.

As soon as we moved to Chicago, pretty much everything possible went wrong as could go wrong. Within the first week it started. We were damaged heavily in the financial area, it set us back years. Happiness was not Chicago.

I couldn't afford to work because of the cost of daycare, and my extreme fear of leaving the boys with someone I didn't know made it even tougher to find someone. Especially since HB's first daycare lady (not Daycare Diva) had a baby die in her care around the time I was contemplating trying to work.

It seemed my only option was to open my own daycare or get a job at a daycare, pay for them to be there while I watched other kids, and probably not make much money. My only hope was to keep my focus on three years in the future, when Boogs would be in Preschool and Kiki would be in Kindergarten.

Wow, that was a long way away. My coping mechanism was not ever thinking about tomorrow. Tomorrow was WAY TOO FAR AWAY. Perhaps the three years wouldn't have sucked if I'd had any friends to hang out with periodically, which I really didn't. And I did not fit in at all in the neighborhood we lived in. Here's me with my $2 garage sale umbrella stroller talking to a mom who can barely lift her hand for the heavy rock on her finger, pushing around her $800 Bugaboo. I'm sorry, I just don't have anything in common with that.

So, I was a bitch on wheels. No one could do anything right, except Bag of Cookies, and I loved them unconditionally. They said all the right things, was quiet when I needed them to be and was always around when I needed a friend. Mmmm....cookies, what can't they do? When people would ask me how I was, my answer was always "I'm maintaining". I got it from the movie Dick. Great flick!! Ooooh! That rhymed! I dealt with it.

One day my landlord/neighbor/friend/only thing that kept me sane, told me he couldn't handle the city anymore and was moving. I couldn't fathom living there without them in my backyard. They were the bright spot in my lonely days. All hope was lost for me.

Then one day we left the city to visit my hometown. JimmyEW and I went out on a little date, I guess I had enough appeal left in my personality for him to want to spend some time alone with me. It was that day, back in Hometown, that he said he saw the old Sassy back and decided that we could move back home.

"Back home" you say? Yes, we had moved to Chicago from Beautiful Northern Michigan, where "The View of the Bay is Half the Pay" and the business owners believe that, for the most part.

JimmyEW told me while we were visiting, that we could move to my Hometown. Personally, I had never wanted to settle down in my hometown, but anything was better than Chicago. So I was happy. But then, on the trip home he suggested that moving to Hometown wasn't so different from Northern Michigan and made the suggested that we just move back. I cried I was so happy. I called my beloved friend and mentor Marcia and excitedly told her. I called everyone I had left behind...which was just two other phone calls lol.

So we made ready. It was August and our lease was up in October, we had 2 months to pull it all together. I started applying for jobs everywhere I could. I called, I hounded, I drove them insane trying to get them to interview me. Nothing. Same with JimmyEW.

Many people thought we were doing the wrong thing. Lots of different people told him to move me out to the suburbs and make me cope. I don't know how many times my mother or a sister told me they thought I had post partum depression. I would get irate, and scream that it was NOT post partum! I was miserable! I was lonely! My husband worked a lot! And we were ruined financially! We couldn't survive there. It was SIT-U-ATIONAL! I didn't want a pill to cope, I wanted to change my SITUATION!

It was now September and we decided that in October I would move regardless, and if he didn't have a job yet, he'd stay in Chicago on my friend's couch until he got a job. I would move, alone with the kids, and keep looking for work. People thought I was crazy, but I knew this was the right thing to do.

It was the second to last week in September and both JimmyEW and I were called for an interview. We both went, found an apartment and signed a lease. I went to my interview and was offered the job making $10,000 less than I was used to making. I wanted it, but my face visible fell when I saw the number. We had done numbers and there was a break even point that I had to get for it to make sense for me to work.

Seeing my face fall, the man started back peddling, saying if I opted out of benefits he could increase and then he'd talk to the owner and see if they could go higher. For some reason he must really wanted to hire me. This is especially funny since the person who would be my supervisor, and later friend, put my resume on the NO pile. Once again, faith coming to save my day.

The next day was JimmyEW's interview. We were at the park when he drove up with a big fat smile on his face. They'd offered him a job at about the break even amount we'd discussed! It would be about a $10,000 pay decrease for him and no company car or gas card, but we'd be home.

We went back to Chicago, packed our crap, I got a call and they offered me a package that had a bit of an increase with a promise to look at it in 90 days and I took it. When JimmyEW got his offer letter and we thought it was a typo. Because, it showed him as making $13,000 more than he was expecting! A freaking pay RAISE and a view of the bay! Semi-charmed life, welcome back to Sassyland!

I moved back home, starting work, put the kids into a daycare that I knew and trusted and JimmyEW came two weeks later. Everything worked out perfectly, just as it should have. We left and moved, putting it all in God's hands to provide for us and He did.

Chicago wasn't all bad. Here's a brief visual overview to things I thought were kind of cool about Chicago.

Sunday in the Park (with Kiki's head and a sleeping Boogs who had a MASSIVE meltdown in the Art Institute. Allergy to dairy, as it turns out)

The thing that kept my head out of the oven. My Landlord, neighbor and friend. He would sit with me, sympathize with me and play with my kids. He was a stay home dad of a 2 year old and I love him and his wife. They made my life bearable.
I also saw people a lot more often. Sister Mary Elephant , for one, who lived about 45 minutes from the city. She'd drop in and spend time with me, do wonderful things for me, clean my NASTY house and play with the boys. I miss her lots :( I also got to see my best friend who lives in KY. She was only 5 hours away. That was a big con to moving.
My beautiful friend who lived in the city, but is a very hard worker and has a very active social life so I didn't spend nearly as much time with her as I'd like to. She is my children's social justice Goddess Mother and I love and miss her.

And of course, the best, we got Boogs in ChicagoBut... it just wasn't home. I know people say that your make home where you are, but we were just in the wrong place. And so it goes. Sometimes you have to do what you know is right for you, even if everyone else is telling you not to.

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Slacker Moms Anonymous

Hi...My name is Sassy...and I'm a slacker mom.

I don't mean slacker in that I like to watch Oprah while eating Bon Bons and ignoring all my duties in life...which I do anyway... but like how I don't plan things until the last minute.

Take this beautiful little guy... my Boogs. He gets the shaft all the time. He is the second after all, so there is just more to take care of. Sometimes the special little things we did with Kiki just get over looked. Sad face.

But he knows I love him. He knows that I love the smell of his sweaty baby feet. Today I took off his socks and then he painstakenly repositioned himself so his feet were in reach. He lifted them to my nose without my prompting. He knows what his mama loves.

So I'm sure he knows that even though I didn't spend tons of time planning his 2nd birthday party, I love him. He doesn't know that I spent almost no time planning his party...or he might just change his mind about me.

In my defense, I was sort of waiting to see if we were going to be moving into a house (which hasn't happened btw). Having a super fun kids birthday party is no fun when everyone has to sit on each other for lack of space. And because it snowed on the beautiful day of April 12th, outside was out of the question. So we held Birthday Bash #2 at the BK playland.

Since I hadn't sent out any invites because I wasn't sure what was going to be happening, I resorted to the biggest, lamest, slacker mom move of all time. I hung up, on the back of the Daycare Diva's door by the sign in sheet, a hastily made Birthday sign up written on scrap paper! And I did it 4 days before the event. As you can guess, none of the daycare buds showed.

It wasn't a total wash. A friend from church showed with her son, HB and Logan came with Big Mama Jean and cousin Bree and Ms. Chic with her boyfriend graced us for a little bit. But the best part, the reason I'm happy I'm a slacker, is because I happened to run into a couple that I used to live by but had lost touch with. And, get this, they have two boys too! One is 4 months older than Kiki, one is 4 months younger than Boogs. Being a loser mom made it all worth it to reconnect. If I'd planned a proper party at the local kids gym or something, I may never have run into them.

And you know what? Boogs didn't care his shindig was on the fly. Just look at him here, see how happy he is!

The little time I did have, I used to make it special for him. That morning we made his favorite breakfast, then we dropped off Kiki so we could have some special Boogs time. That probably meant more to him than anything else that day.

...Well, except the Muppets Season 2 of course. We definitely took a backseat to that. When he opened that gift it caused some problems since he wanted to watch it right then and there in BK. We tried distraction, that didn't work and hiding it from him only caused him to spend a good 10 minutes crawling around the dirty floor trying to locate it. Wow, does he love his Kermit.

At his party he got a cookie cake, he got to play with his friends, and he got presents! What could be better than that? To a two year old, that is heaven I think.

So sure, I didn't spend a bunch of money on throwing a huge party at a fancy place with a clown and such. But he's two, he doesn't care, so I don't even feel bad.

Now I do sort of feel bad that he hasn't had any pictures taken since August. And that none of his Aunts and Uncles got copies of those pictures.

So, what is the worst slacker mom or dad thing you've done? Am I the only slacker out there? I know I'm not because my friend from church told me about this book Confessions of a Slacker Mom

She said she would let me borrow it. It was funny because she said she thought about mentioning it to me before but she didn't want to offend. Lol! So I think I may be checking out this book and taking notes and trying to not be such a slacker mom.

If you want to read other bloggers complaining about the pressure to throw a really great birthday party, check out Suburban Turmoil she came up with a pretty interesting birthday party for her four-year-old.

Well, I have to stop being such a slacker and fold some laundry, but in the mean time for your viewing pleasure, a picture of Kiki and Boogs enjoying one of the gifts Boogs got. Muppet Show Season 2. It MUST be danced to.

Sorry for the badly dressed Kiki and Boogs. Honestly, its not a slacker mom thing there. They just both had accidents at daycare and came home in wet or mismatched clothing. I had nothing to do with it. I swear!

8-week check in located above this post.

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It Seems Our Job Here is Done

Tom and I like to joke about how Logan pretty much raises himself. We're here just in case of fire.

I struggle to stay one step ahead of my kid. He often trips me up and catches me sleeping on the job of being his mom.

He reminds me to help him with him homework, makes sure I am planning to attend a meeting with his teacher, remembers things I miss on the grocery list and lets me know that his car seat straps aren't nearly tight enough. While it's all very helpful, it tends to make me feel a little bit like crap.

One day I was driving through McDonald's to get a diet coke. When it came time for me to pay, I could not find my money anywhere. I looked all through my purse, my briefcase, my car. It was no where to be found and I was certain I had put cash in my bag that very morning.

I pulled into a parking space (which I am sure thrilled the hungry people behind me waiting for their Big Macs) to continue the search. Finally, I did the one thing I had been putting off. I called my (then) four year old son for help.

Logan was at Sassy's house being watched by his Uncle Jim. It would be a lie to say I was not a whole lot embarrassed to have Uncle Jim ask Logan where I put my money that morning. Jim kept asking me if that's what I really intended for him to ask. Finally he did.

And sure enough, my boy had the answer. He got on the phone and let me know that I had thrown the cash in my red lunch bag. Then he went back to playing with his dinosaurs. I felt very foolish, and yet I was thrilled to be able to get my fountain pop.

Tonight I took Logan out for ice cream. As we sat at the table chatting about the importance of football and hockey jerseys (they are critical to his happiness), skiing (he wants to be on the bunny hill a little bit longer thank you very much) and Spring break (he called his grandma and sisters Big and Redd and made plans to spend it with them) he looked at me and said "Mom, if there is a fire, I will grab my coat and you get your purse, OK?".

I started to worry that perhaps my work here really is done. But then I looked at my kid with chocolate ice cream glommed all over his face and his shoes on the wrong feet and his hand that always needs to be touching me and realized we still have a long road ahead of us, thank you God.

It will just be easier during an emergency. He'll be able to remind me to grab my photo albums and purse on our way out the door. And there's nothing wrong with that.
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Our Boys

Logan loves his cousins. They are the closest thing he has to a sibling.

Here they are playing in the rain. Actually, climbing into the basketball hoop, but whatever.

They let their daddies rake big ol' piles of leaves and then jump in and destroy all that hard work. That's OK. They're building memories, right?

They love to skate on the ice, and let the adults spin them in circles until they are dizzy.

Every single year they get together to bake Christmas cookes. Then they eat them.

They pretend to hunt a rabbit and make a stew.

They tattle and then defend.

They fight and then make up.

They laugh and play and wrestle and chase.

When his cousins leave, it's not long before Logan wonders when they can come over again.

They are cousins. And they are friends.

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The Mommy Wars

I am a minority. Not because of my race, gender, disability or sexual preference. Nor due to my nationality, my age or my religion. But I am treated differently and discriminated against just the same.

I am a Working Mom who is also a Christian. To top it off, I am a Catholic mom with only one child. (Stop staring, it's rude.)

I grew up in a very large family of eight children. My mom was always working. Whether she was picking blueberries (with us working right along beside her), working in our garden (Which was the size of half a football field. Seriously.), canning vegetables, running a daycare, operating a fabric store, managing my dad's business or going to college. She worked a lot. It was her nature, her make-up, The way she was created. When Sassy was nine, our mom finished college and began her new career. She retired two years ago.

I have chosen to work outside my home as well. My parents, siblings and most of my friends support my decision, but many people do not. Often, I will hear acquaintances comment that they have chosen to make sacrifices so that are able stay home and raise their children. Sister Seven wrote that she is "called by God to be home with her girls and homeschool them". I think the choice to work or to stay home is a very personal one. But staying home is often considered more honorable, more noble. The option that God would approve of the most. I disagree.

When I first started blurfing (blog surfing for you newbies), it was with the intention of finding a site for women who had a strong faith, loved their family and enjoyed their careers. I couldn't find one. I was surprised and dismayed to find many articles chastising women for "abandoning their children to daycare and public schools".

I emailed Big Mama, Boo Mama (I am their biggest stalker) and other popular bloggers asking for some direction and they were stumped. There are many sites devoted to moms who work from home, but I couldn't find any with moms who are open about their ambitions, career goals and faith.

So, I'll start. My name is Sister Honey Bunch. I am Christian and I love to work. It fulfills me. It makes me happy. It keeps me sane. It provides for my family. It gives us opportunities we wouldn't otherwise have.

When we had Logan, I was 34 and Tom was 39. Because we started our family a bit later than most, we aren't just saving money for Logan's college education. We also are saving for our retirement. And the assisted living facility. So, not only do I want to work, but I really need to work in order for us to achieve our goals.

I often hear the argument that it isn't biblical to work outside the home if you have children. Again, I disagree. If you look at the Proverbs 31 woman, what was she doing?

• She was being called "blessed" by her children. (I get called in to search for a missing Power Ranger, but whatever.)


• She was a true partner with her husband. (That's what I'm talkin' 'bout.)


• She wore beautiful clothing and cared about how she looked. (I am sure she would be a fan of What Not to Wear)


• She managed her household. (She had servants. Me? I clean my own toilets. And by "me", I mean "Tom".)


• She volunteered in her community and helped the needy.


• She was an entrepreneur. The Proverbs 31 woman bought real estate (a field), re-invested her profits, produced goods and sold them.

Please don't think for a second that I'm implying that stay-at-home-moms are just hanging out watching Oprah and munching on cheese and crackers (my activity and snack of choice when I'm home). Most of my sisters stayed home with their kids. I was able to see first-hand just how hard they worked day-in and day-out. And late into the night. Because "a woman's work..."

My issue is with those who think that it is better in God's eyes for the mother to stay home with her children than to have a job.

While having a career is fulfilling for me, it also carries its own challenges. I often suffer from Working Mother's Guilt. My husband and I have to juggle the household duties. I work to make sure my time with my kid is spent wisely. And I also work to make sure he doesn't think that my life should revolve around him when I am home. That's a tough one to balance.

I know from talking with my sisters and girlfriends that staying home has its own concerns. My hope is that we can all accept the choices we each make and recognize that there is not one "right" choice. There is a great article here that discusses this very thing: Women supporting women.

I intend to explore this topic more here at Sisters of a Different Order and would love your feed back. Please email me or leave me a comment about your thoughts on this subject.

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A Visit with Wild Bill (aka Our Dad): My Three Sons Edition

Our post about our father generated a lot of interest and many people have requested an update as to how he is doing. Honey Bunch and I are genuinely touched by your concern.

Our three brothers flew down to visit our dad and had quite an interesting adventure. From One-Son constantly losing our dad's dentures (he is 51, so his forgetfulness can be excused. Have you tried Gingko Billy Ray?), to their discovery of our dad's home having been robbed by the hillbilly losers who live nearby. Here is there email update they sent to the rest of us.

South Carolina is cold and rainy and we got an early start. One Son got the earliest start because when setting his cell phone he compensated for the time zone change AFTER his cell phone had already changed to Eastern time. He was downstairs drinking coffee at 5:00 AM before he realized Brother Bobbo and Brother Lee wouldn't even be getting up for another hour.

We planned to drive to the trailer, give it a quick once over, grab the TV and VCR and move them to dad's room. Then get the Power of Attorney signed and drive back to Hamer. Brother One Son would sign on to dad's bank accounts, Bobbo would get dad's car running, and Brother Lee would scour the trailer for important, sentimental or valuable stuff.

We drove the 40 minutes to the Hamer homestead first thing, arriving about 8:30 AM.

THE TRAILER I
The trailer had been broken into. No surprise. The front door lock had been punched out and the padlock pried loose. The interior had been totally ransacked. Chairs turned over, bed torn apart, food and random junk and clothes strewn about. Even the refrigerator had been pulled away from the wall and walked toward the front door before the white trash decided stealing it was too much work. They had literally torn open dad's briefcase, leaving only his Bible and a copy of the World Wide Church of God hymnal.
The TV and VCR had been stolen, along with two space heaters, a boom box, and god only knows what other fenceable/pawnable stuff. We did find dad's glasses and his teeth. Dad's 1994 Cutlass Ciera started up, but needed some fluids.

NURSING HOME
Dad: "Did you find my teeth?"
Bobbo: "We have good news and bad news. We found your teeth but One Son put them down and didn't remember to pick them up again." Brother Lee: "We have a new Quelf rule: If Billy puts them down he has to announce: 'I no longer have dad's teeth!'. He has to keep saying it until he picks them up again." (Dad should have his teeth back, safe and warm and wet in his mouth tomorrow)

Because dad's roommate had recently died, his TV left with him. Dad's comment was, "They stole that TV. It couldn't have been his. He was an invalid." Dad really missed the TV, so on the way back to the nursing home we stopped into Walmart and bought him a new 20" digital set which got a really great picture! With rabbit ears!

While Brother Bobbo and Brother Lee set up the TV, One Son and dad got the Power of Attorney signed and notarized. On the way back to his room, dad had the nurse stop his wheelchair at the nurses station for drink. The nurses were all, "Hi, Mr. Stephens! How are you? Are those your boys? Are those your new glasses? Where they been, did those boys hide them from you?"

One Son said, "It was the only way we could think of to keep him out of trouble." The nurses all giggled. Dad replied, "Look at me. What more trouble could I be in?" The nurses giggled some more.

We showed dad his new TV and he started flipping through the channels. We gave him the sweater mom had mailed him a couple months earlier (it had been forwarded to One Son), and a digital picture frame/clock/calendar for his room. We also instructed the Social Services director to please replace all the door and drawer labels in dad's room with new labels that spell dad's name correctly. Mr. Stephens, not Mr. Stevens. Then we hit the road again for Hamer.

LUNCH
Chic-fil-a take-out. Three number one combos with a Coke. Nuff said.

THE TRAILER II
The trailer is a total disaster. Holes in the floor covered by plywood covered by carpet covered by more carpet covered by food and old clothes. No heat, water or electricity. Holes in the doors, held shut by chains. Everything filthy. Everything scattered everywhere. The house smells of pickles.

Boxes of crap everywhere. 300 or more VCR tapes of movies he recorded. 100 tapes of church sermons and special bulletins. Cold and damp. A gallon of moonshine on a cupboard. Food and dirty dishes scattered among the old clothes books and church pamphlets. We found two suitcases packed with nice clean clothes. Presumably planning to go to the Feast before deciding he was not up to it.

There was ground steak, a jar of mushrooms, some onions on the floor. Dinner that never got cooked. We also sifted though the shed. It had been broken into also, but was cleaner, dryer and warmer than the trailer. He had started wiring it for electricity. We wondered whether he was going to open up a new business office, or was planning to move into it to live.

Brother Lee and Bobbo searched the trailer and shed. We found an Isramco stock certificate, the missing teeth, checkbook, a walking stick, a bunch of photos and letters, a 1951 issue of Sport magazine, a dead bird, lots of random tools and copier parts. The letters are particularly interesting.

THE CAR
The Cutlass had no brakes - but once filled with brake fluid, it would stop if you pushed the pedal all the way to the floor, then tried to push it through the firewall. It had no coolant but we filled it up. The trunk was dry but dirty, and the lock worked - a vast improvement over the previous vehicle.
Bobbo filled the fluids, cleaned the interior, put air in the tires. We put most of the salvageable clothes, memories and random stuff into the trunk and locked it up.

We drove the car to Edna's for overnight. Friday Bobbo'll call a repair shop and get a price for fixing the breaks. If it can be fixed cheaply enough, we'll repair it and let mom drive it while she's down here. We'll keep it at Edna's for the short term.

THE BANK
One Son filed POA with the county. Went to the bank and got himself signed on to dad's checking account. Cancelled the debit card. Confirmed that dad had not cashed a large check in the previous three months, so the thieves probably didn't get more than a few dollars cash.

Then One Son asked to use the bathroom. Everybody in the bank stopped what they were doing and stared at the teller.

"I'm sorry, the bathroom isn't for public use," the teller said. Everybody turned to stare at Billy. "That's okay. I'm not the public. I'm a customer."

Everybody turned to stare at the teller.

"We don't usually do this, but okay. Here's the key." Everybody stared at them both as they walked across the bank floor. "Well," One Son said. "I won't tell anyone if you won't."

AUNT EDNA (pictured right. Bobbo, Edna, One Son and Big Mama)
We met mom at Edna's, and took her out for a bite at the Dry Dock for some fish soup, fried oysters and hush puppies with tails - and why wouldn't they have tails? Then back to the hotel.

MIDNIGHT
We ate dinner and drank beers and told stories til past midnight.
ONE A.M. We wrote this update before going to bed.

One Son called the county Sheriff and told them about the break-in and list of stolen property. He spoke with Lt.Smith (sounded like a young woman) who knew dad: she had gone out to check on him when we (H.B or Sassy?) called. Said he was a nice man.She was literally offended that we didn't think to call her officeand ask them to look in on the trailer when we learned he was in thehospital. And she was incensed that we didn't make a police reportthe minute we saw the place had been broken into. I admitted we wereidiots and she was, "Well, okay then. I wish your dad the best.".

UPDATE
Mom saw dad today and said he looked awesome. He was sitting up, had his teeth in and had gotten his hair cut. He was alert and happy. The nurses even stopped her as she was going by to tell her about his progress.

They have gotten him off almost all of his mood altering medication. He is eating better, they don't have to thicken the liquids as much and he even fed himself some. And he has been standing up and even took a few steps in physical therapy. He can even lift his left leg!

Mom said that we wouldn't recognize the progress from what we say that was less than two weeks ago. He still forgets and has his tremors but it sounds like good progress. This man a few months ago was given less than 6 months to live and now with his progress we are all hopeful that he is on his way to being able to return to Michigan. We'll be sure to keep you all updated.

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL?!?!

We're having us some football here at the house of Honey Bunch. Sassy and I had intended to have our first monthly Sisters of a Different Order business meeting tonight while the guys watched the game and the kids played like angels.

Instead we had a couple "come to Jesus" meetings with those kids, a meeting in the time out corner, a meeting of how best to get three kids to quit screaming and a meeting at the liquor cabinet. Sassy's been here for two hours and we have been on-topic for approximately a minute and a half. We're going to throw in the towel and go watch Project Runway and some Super Bowl Commercials

On the menu tonight:

Nachos with Jalepenos

Nachos without Jalaepenos.

Cheese and Crackers

Some other Mexican fattening snack

Pizza rolls for the loud kids

Ice cream for the loud kids

Beer and more Beer

Smirnoff and more Smirnoff

Diet Coke and more Diet Coke

See ya'll tomorrow!

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$545 Kitchen Makeover? Oh, yeah baby.

When we were house hunting, the real estate market was booming and every house we put an offer on already had about four or five offers ahead of us. It was very frustrating.

One afternoon we looked at the house we ended up purchasing. I hated, hated, hated everything about it. It had the wallpaper from hell. The kitchen made me want to curl up in a ball and cry like a baby. There was no separation between the living room and the dining room. The space didn't flow. At all.

After I spent a few minutes looking around I was ready to leave. Tom asked me to open my mind to the possibilities that this place had. So I tried. And I couldn't see any. We left, but Tom kept talking about this house and how great he thought it was. I thought he was smoking crack, because I promise you when I say there was not one charming thing about the place.

Because I love my husband (and wanted him to please shut up already), I agreed to look at it one more time. I am nothing if not (begrudgingly) fair.

We walked in and Tom immediately started describing the different things we could do to make it beautiful. I seem to have no vision when it comes to home decor. (Which is why I am in desperate need of help from The Nester. Go there. You'll thank me.) because I wasn't able to see what Tom saw.

I did appreciate a few of its qualities though. The neighborhood was one we really liked and this particular house was located in a cul-de-sac. The yard was nice and big and surrounded by beautiful trees. So, we bought it.

Since we didn't have a bazillion dollars (or $25,000) to have someone come in and help transform the place we did it all ourselves. And by "we", I mean "Tom". Well, I did help with some stuff. Like cleaning. And choosing paint colors. And handing Tom the whatcha-macallits when he asked for them.

We put knotty pine paneling in our family room along with gorgeous built-in bookcases (because books are my friend). We installed a wood burning stove to make us all nice and cozy on movie nights. And Super Bowl Sundays.

We pulled up the nasty carpet and put down wood floors. We replaced the hideous gold toilet and sink in the bathroom. And that was just plain gross.

Tom also put up wainscoting to show my much-desired definition between the living and dining rooms. Because he worships the ground upon which I walk. Doesn't it look great?

When the time came to remodel our kitchen, I felt like it was my wedding day. Except I wasn't pregnant.

We (and again, by we, I mean Tom) pulled off the HIDEOUS faux wood-grain countertop. We removed the nasty, dirty, chipped ceramic tiles from the floor and got rid of the sink.

While I was cleaning up his big, fat mess (he is a very messy home remodel-er), Tom painted our cabinets and installed new knobs. I just have to call your attention to my knobs. Are they not adorable? They're twigs!
They make me happy every single solitary day. It's the little things, you know.

We also put in a new countertop. It is faux granite, (and lovely), new flooring and a new (to us) sink. All for $545.00.



Here are some Before and After pictures to inspire your own Kitchen Makeover on a Budget.

Ok. First, ick. Look at those NASTY brown cabinets. I Know! I hate them too. And what about the faux wood-grain countertop? Could anything be more wrong than that? And what is with the weird counter arrangement? Don't worry. I came home one night to my Tommy with a power tool in his hand. He took care of that bad boy.

Here is another view of those hideous cabinets. Ugh. Look at the dirty looking grout on the tiles. Gross, no?

Ok, for fun, let's just take a peek through the door here at check out the wallpaper I told you about. I had to steam that nastiness off. It took about a month. Or maybe it just felt like a month. I don't know.

Now we will check out the fabulousness that is my new kitchen. Hi pretty painted cabinets! We are so thrilled to have you here.

Aren't my floors so warm and inviting? And my cabinets (again)! And my countertops? And my knobs! (You're wishing you were married to my Tommy, aren't you? Yeah, I don't mind picking up his socks off the floor. Look what he does for me. Plus, he's cute.)

Here is my new sink. Well, new to me, anyway. Apparently, it has some fancy schmancy garbage disposal unit that everyone raves about. I'm not sure how it is so much greater than your average garbage disposal, but I feel pretty darn special all the same. I heart Tom's brother for giving it to us. (Hey Nester!What should I do with my naked window?)

My coral/salmon/orangey colored walls make me smile. You know what else makes me smile? My lightened grout. I still need to tidy it up, but it looks so much better.

This green bin here to the left? That's Tom's catch-all. When he comes in the house, he throws random "stuff" in there. Let's take a peek and see what's in there today, mmm-k?

A gift receipt from Christmas. (He's a bit of a saver.) Chewing gum, razor blades (in case some type of razor-blading emergency comes up, maybe?), sun glasses, an itunes gift card (also from Christmas. Maybe I'll just use it.), his phone charger, a cell phone, bills to be mailed, and boat keys. For a boat that is in storage. Because it's February in Northern Michigan.
What's that?
Oh, and look what else. A picture of me and my dad when I was thirteen. Now, that's just the sweetest thing ever.

You're probably just dying to know how we were able to achieve all of this fabulousness for so cheap? Would you like me to break it down for you?
Flooring: $200.00
Countertop: $225.00
Mini Tiles: $ 25.00
Paint: $ 50.00
Knobs: $ 45.00
Sink: $ 0.00
Happy Honey Bunch: Priceless. Because, really. If I'm happy, everybody will be happy. Am I right?

Have you done a Home Makeover on a budget? Please share your tips in our comments, or post a link to your blog with your own story.

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Simple is the New Black

I struggle with envy. It doesn't overpower my life and make me miserable. Nor does it cause me to spend money I don't have. It doesn't even make me harbor ill-will toward those who have more than I do. But it does still have an impact on my daily life.

I have a nice home, and wonderful family and great friends. I have a reliable car that isn't rusting out on me. I have a boat to enjoy with those I love. I have a good job. But I often want more.

What do I want? I want to be a skinny and gorgeous mom like I see at Logan's school every day. I want her perfectly straight, bleached teeth. I want that humongous diamond ring that is so heavy on her manicured hand she can barely wave to me. I want her designer wardrobe, her Fendi bag, her toned and tanned body. I want her hair that doesn't go too long between highlights, and her housekeeper who keeps things shiny and nice. I want her daily lunches with girlfriends. Her latest and greatest everything.

I am the oldest mom in my son's class. I am also one of the few working moms in his class. My teeth could use some Colgate Strips. My wardrobe is only designer because I haunt resale stores and shop eBay. My bag is a Kate Spade knock-off from two years ago.

My body has betrayed me and I am forced to participate in this God-forsaken 10 Week Challenge. I'm six weeks overdue for a cut and color. I clean my own house thank you very much. (And, I actually enjoy it.) I take leftovers for lunch so we can save for spring break. I don't have a latest and greatest anything. My ring...well, it is gorgeous and perfect.

You know what I do have though? I have a husband who comes home to me every single night. Who works hard on our home remodel so it is as beautiful as we want. He helps with the laundry, cooks many dinners each week and he rubs my feet. Every. Single. Night.

I have a son who is precious and funny and naughty and smart. I have parents and in-laws who love me and would do anything for me. Brothers and sisters who are smarter and funnier than anyone I know. I have amazing nieces and nephews who crack me up. I have the best friends anyone could ever want.

At Mass this weekend, Father Bill talked about envy and how in the early church people were being idiots arguing "I'm on Paul's side." "Yeah, well Peter is my man" and not being satisfied with where they were and what they were supposed to be doing. Envy sucks. We need to be content, friends.

So, I purged yesterday. This is the day my husband has been dreaming about! I emptied out all of my drawers in my office and threw away stuff I no longer need. I cleaned my pantry, my refrigerator, my cabinets. I took clothes I haven't worn in the last 8 months and put them in the Goodwill pile. Logan chose toys he doesn't play with anymore and is giving them away. We took six bags out of our home today. It is an amazing feeling. Can I hear an Amen?

In addition to church and my husband's fantasies, I was also influenced by a couple bloggers I have been stalking. (Shhhhh.)

Rachel at The Simple Family has been focused on making her life more, well, simple. Her family is eliminating what they don't need, and really considering why they spend their money. Go over there and get inspired.

Another family has taken A Year Off from shopping. They are not doing this to save money. They decided to only spend money on things that they absolutely need. One reader wrote in and questioned if Diet Coke would be a want or a need. Um, hello? Total and complete need right here! Duh.

My personal goal is to continue purging. I'm going to purge my annoying working-mom guilt. I'm going to purge the dated and ugly clothes in my closet. I'm going to purge the fear to take a chance at something I love. I'm going to purge living with limits. And I'm going to purge my resentment toward those skinny, cute moms because they ain't got what I got. Can I hear a "Preach it, Sister"?

But wait! THERE'S MORE! It's time for my 10 Week Challenge Update!

Goals Accomplished
In possession of medication---check.
Eating protein and veggies all day, every day---check.
Down two wonderful pounds---BIG. FAT. CHECK. BABY!

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