Now why am I afraid of the monkey's paw? I don't know, clearly I don't have a petrified primate appendage hidden in my closet, just something about that story got to me. The byproduct is I find myself terribly afraid of wishing for more than I have or even praying for a blessing. Crazy isn't it? Jimmy tells me all the time that God doesn't work that way and in my head I know it, I think I just fear some sort of repercussion for not being happy with what I have. Or perhaps its my "the world revolves around me" complex that leaves me feeling like everything that happens is some how my responsibility. Good and bad.
I guess right now, particularly because I'm a little stressed about money and wanting to be able to buy a home and stay put for good, I have been looking for a few blessings. So I find myself talking to God and asking for a blessing but specifying that it not come through harm to anyone or anything. Then I sit around feeling guilty and wondering how I'd feel if something awful did happen to someone I loved and I found myself with that thing I wanted. It's a vicious cycle and its pointless.
For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.
That second one has given me something to chew on. Oh, and sorry if the petrified hand if it gave you the willies.
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