I'm a Sucky Friend DOT com

I was minding my own business last night getting ready for bed. I tidied things up, turned off the lights, forgot to turn down the heat (sorry Tom!), washed my face and checked my email. Bad move. Really bad. Because Sister Big decided to take it upon herself to let me know that I am indeed a crappy friend. Isn't she just the nicest thing? Unfortunately, she's right.

She was referring to my friend Joy who I became friends with about 13 years ago. I was still single then and she and I spent a lot of time taking relaxing vacations (really, she is the best vacation partner EVAH), going to movies and concerts, prowling for single men and doing the tour of churches searching for the right fit.

But then I moved up north, got married and had a kid. While I struggled with my postpartum depression, I went back to work full time. When I walked through my front door at the end of the day, I hibernated with my glass of wine and People magazine.

Through all of this my girlfriends remained kind and loyal and patient. Especially Joy. Because that's how she rolls.

Joy is funny, kind, pretty and smart. She serves on the local school board even though she doesn't have children of her own yet. She is president of a successful company that develops gorgeous neighborhoods. She is confident and capable. She is generous and can play a mean game of volley ball. And sometimes I forget that she also has needs.

I made a resolution to her this year to be a better friend and I have failed miserably. And she told on me to Sister Big when they ran into each other at Walgreens. And Sister Big got all over my case. Because apparently that is, and always will be, her job.

But Joy's not the only one who suffers from my crappy-friend syndrome. I'm an equal opportunity neglecter. I sometimes have a hard time making myself go out with my girlfriends. And it's not because I don't have fun. I always do. It's not because I don't love them. I adore them. It's usually because I want to hang with Tom and Logan. Or I'm feeling lazy and want to watch American Idol. But I need to remember I'm not just a mom and a wife (or a tv-aholic). I'm a sister and a friend and those roles are very important too.

So, Sister Big? Shut up, I'm going to call Joy and slop some sugar on her. And not because you said to, but because she deserves it.

Now here's a song from my girl Natalie dedicated to all my girls. Because I heart you. (Especially you.)



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