Wednesday, April 30, 2008

American Idol, Dawg

I am compelled to review American Idol this week for a couple of reasons. First, I loves me some Neil Diamond. What is better than a little Sweet Caroline and I Am I Said?

Second, I have a big ol happily-married-woman-crush on David Cook. He is just smokin' hot the way he looks at me when he sings. Plus he cried the day his sick brother was in the audience. And, he's got a great voice. Which helps when you're in a huge talent competition that is based on, you know, singing.

Third, I want Jason to. just. go. home. I know there are some die-hard Jason fans (Ashlee), but there's something about the kid that really bothers me. Maybe it's the way he ignored Andrew Lloyd Webber's advice last week (Dude, the man is a musical genius. You are a baby. Listen to him!). Or the fact that he always looks a little bit high and he has a case of the munchies. Either way, I am not a fan.

But the main reason? It's my way of getting Boo Mama over here. See, I'm kind of her biggest stalker and she has barely acknowledged my presence. When you stalk someone? You would like them to know you exist. So, I'm linking our blog from hers today and I'm hoping she comes to visit.

In the interest of full disclosure, I wasn't able to watch the entire show. I had to go to a follow up meeting for my Beth Moore bible study. I left just as soon as I was able and got home in time for the second half hour. The Honey Bunch family lives like it's still 2006 and we do not have TIVO. I saw everyone sing their second song and am basing my opinion solely on that.

THIS is your American Idol review:

Syesha sang Thank The Lord for the Nighttime. Girl had it going on. I'm not familiar with this song but she did a great job.

My buddy Jason sang September Morn, which was unfortunate. He was bored. I was bored. The only people not bored were the girls swinging their arms (out of sync mind you) in the front row. When the judges yawned, rubbed their eyes and told him that he did a lousy job he tried to blame it on almost choking when he first started singing. So a goober was to blame for his blah-ness.

(As we went to commercial, the camera panned the audience. I am pretty certain I saw Hugh Hefner's girlfriends in the front row. Which makes me a little bit sick. American Idol is a family friendly show. Three hootchie mamas sharing an 85 year old man for a boyfriend? Not so family friendly. Makes me throw up a little in my mouth.)


My boyfriend David Cook sang All I Need Is You. Right to me. Did you notice that too? He's in love with me. And, my man ROCKED IT.

One of my favorite Neil Diamond songs is I Am I Said. When I saw Brooke was going to sing it, I got scared. I was sure she would forget the words. I needn't have worried about that since she WROTE THEM ON HER HANDS. Like this was an algebra test. Yes she did!

She didn't kill the song, but it was just "meh" for me. The thing she has going for her are her twinkly, sparkly eyes and pretty smile. She should do toothpaste commercials or be the new Breck girl. I don't want her winning this.

I would like to adopt David Archuletta. He could be Logan's new big brother and sleep in the top bunk. He's a doggone cutie patootie and sang America. While he was a bit shaky in the beginning, he brought it home at the end.

I think Syesha will be in the bottom two because she doesn't have a very strong fan base. Jason will be sitting right next to her since he put everyone to sleep and they have no idea what he sang.

And on a side note, did Simon look a little extra sex-ay tonight? I thought so. And I think Paula was sober! She was giving good advice and critiquing the songs like a pro.

Now go to Boo Mama's and check out some more reviews that are way better than mine.


What's that? You want to comment? Just click on the itty-bitty words below that say "Gimme Some Sugar". Can you see them? Good. We can't wait to chat with you.

28 comments:

Cindy Beall said...

Two things:
1. Secret "happily married crush" on David Cook. Love how you phrased that.
2. Syesha's performances - she's just good.

Enjoyed your read!

Shanda said...

If you have the happily married crush...then I for sure have the Happily unmarried infatuation for David Cook.

Pajama Mama said...

HoneyBunch, I think you missed something. You said you thought Paula was sober, right? Honey, you didn't see what I saw...prob before you got to the tv. No kidding.

We heart us some David Cook, too, and think Jason needs to run along.

Very funny review...

Blessings, Jeannie

Tammy said...

Oh my heart is breaking for your family right now....no DVR? *cry*

Now, for AI. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE me some David Cook and Neil Diamond.

I'm still sighing over Paula's apparent psychotic break. Bless her heart.

Melzie said...

humph well we are gona bounce because not only is Simon mine but so is David so see ya all you get it munchie Jason! ;) loved your review! blog on. xoxo melzie

Cindy-Still His Girl said...

Get yourself a DVR!! World's BEST invention.

Sarah said...

I am always grateful for these posts because now I know what is going on in the world. Everyone talks about American Idol and I just have too many other shows that I want to see and can't fit in either. Now I can talk intelligently to my friends.

Suzie said...

I have a secretly married crush on Colin Firth.

Simon was definitely working it with the V-neck.

I love that you and your sister are blogging together.

Suzie said...

Ha! Ha!...I mean happily married crush...I'm not secretly married to Colin...oh my...

Daily Mish Mash said...

Since you don't have TIVO, could you just set your vcr to record Idol. That was what we used to do before we got one. It was annoying as anything, but it got the job done. If you had recorded it then you wouldn't have missed the BEST Paula moment in the entire season. It was all kinds of bizarre.

Ok, so to answer your question on why I love Jason. The bottom line is that it is his style of music and the tone of his voice. I would actually buy his music where I doubt I would buy any of the others (maybe David C. if it wasn't too hard of rock). Plus, I know that Jason is singing to me every week (couldn't you tell the way he was looking at me), so I kind of feel like I have to support him. I do think he answers the question of whether or not they do drug testing on Idol.

saintseester said...

Wasn't it david c. who did the rendition of Billy Jean, with angst. Yum.

Amy said...

I found this fascinating. I don't watch Idol. I know. I'm the ONLY one. The dude in the picture is cute though!

Sister Sassy said...

Add me to the list of not having seen Idol for the last 5 or so seasons.

Oh well.

Ashlee said...

Ok...I have need to clarify a few things here.... :0)
First off...Jason lost his boyfriend status last week when he said he didn't know ANY of Andrew Lloyd Webber's songs. Seriously? What musician doesn't know Phantom or CATS? And then he hacked the song...the girl song he chose to sing. And then he yawned backstage during the Wednesday show. Not impressed. His initial intrigue has been lost. He acts as though he doesn't care and that makes me angry for everyone else that is trying so hard.
AND THEN....Paula is a loon. She started talking about Jason's song #2 before he had even sung it...and her excuse was..."this is hard!" Um....ok?
And finally....
Syesha will probably be in the bottom 2 but she has a killer voice. Jason needs to go THIS WEEK! Brooke...not so sure about her, but I still want to love her. David Archuletta bothers me. And David Cook should win the whole thing. Though I don't want him to be my boyfriend. :0)
Can't wait to see who gets the boot tonight!

Amanda (Shamelessly Sassy) said...

Oh yes, I too have a 'happily married woman crush' on David Cook. Oh.my. And I LOVE Neil Diamond songs. Love them. I loved when David Cook did the version of Billy Jean.

BevMama said...

Thanks for the visit on my blog and the comment. I see we have the same boyfriend -- perhaps we should wrestle it out!! ;-)
Beverly@beverlyhappymoment.blogspot.com!

Alicia said...

Thanks for reading AND leaving a comment on my blog. That's so cool! You have a great writing style!

Valarie said...

I know I will probably get flogged for this, but I don't watch American Idol. I know, I know everyone else does, but I just don't have alot of time to watch TV. Then when I get to it seems like I am always having to watch SpongeBob.

I do agree about Jason though I did see him one time, and I can't believe he is still there.

Candy said...

If you even think about touching my David, I will beat you down, grrl!

Seriously, my 17 year old daughter is plastering her room with pictures of him. He is so cute he hurts my eyes!

Natalie Witcher said...

THanks for popping over! I missed it last night becuase we had small group at my house. AND i have to miss it tonight. So I'm relying on all y'all to help me out! Can't wait for the finale!

fishwithoutbicycle said...

I'd never even heard of David Cook until this post ;-)

womaninawindow said...

I only have this to say, "Jason, GET OFF THE STOOL, GET UP, GET UP!"

alwayssomethin said...

As Ashlee said, you missed it. Paula is a dingbat. I don't know what she is on, but that girl needs some help. I am actually embarrassed for her most weeks.

Jen of A2eatwrite said...

LOVE David Cook, and I agree about Jason... but as we now know... he's sitting on the couch, darn it!

Sandy C. said...

ROFL!!! I'm still giggling here reading your AI review :) You are so spot on about Jason an his perma- high look. I'm so bummed I missed the show :( I'm curious who went home!

Ashlee said...

So, are you super upset that Jason wasn't booted?

The Flecchia's said...

Wow, are we haring the same brain/heart? I think David Cook is
"smokin' hot" that is exactly how I described him to my sister-in-law the other day!! And I agree, there is something sensitive and sensual about the way he looks (at ME!!) when he sings..like he is SO into me (the audience or whatever) It give me the chills I, too, am married so it is a also a "happily married woman crush"
Thanks for the laughs!
Can we share him??

Miss jane said...

成人論壇,080聊天室,080苗栗人,免費a片,視訊美女,視訊做愛,免費視訊,伊莉討論區,sogo論壇,台灣論壇,plus論壇,維克斯論壇,情色論壇,性感影片,正妹,走光,色遊戲,情色自拍,kk俱樂部,好玩遊戲,免費遊戲,貼圖區,好玩遊戲區,中部人聊天室,情色視訊聊天室,聊天室ut,成人電影,成人遊戲,成人文學,免費成人影片,成人光碟,情色遊戲,情色a片,情色網,性愛自拍,美女寫真,亂倫,戀愛ING,免費視訊聊天,視訊聊天,成人短片,美女交友,美女遊戲,18禁,三級片,自拍,後宮電影院,85cc,免費影片,線上遊戲,色情遊戲,日本a片,美女,成人圖片區,avdvd,色情遊戲,情色貼圖,女優,偷拍,正妹牆